gliderlogs

Basquiat

2005-03-27T21:20:00.000-08:00

On a grey saturday afternoon, on my way to a friend's dinner party, I saw the retrospective on Basquiat at the Brooklyn Museum. An apt quote on the artist, who's been compared to Icarus in his meteoric rise and fall:

"I believe that, as an expression of a time that is tragic like no other in the history of the world, he consciously aimed his flight in the opposite direction, toward the infernos that are unexplored even by the outcasts of humanity who live out their brief earthly existence in the sinister roar of the subway, no longer on the road, but underground, irresistibly attracted by the disturbing profundity of the abyss."

-Robert Damiani, (Deputy Mayor and Councilor for Cultural Affairs, New York

uprising day

2005-03-12T07:55:00.000-08:00

I keep running into Tibetan people this week. First at a sandwhich shop - where the manager egged me on to get the veggie pattie sandwhich, between animated, chit-chat in Tibetan with his workers. Apparently there's a sizeable exiled community in Queens.

The other day I was on the way back to work from grabbing lunch. Stopping at the light on 42nd street and Madison, I saw in front of me a stream of people, extending down the street as far as I can see, chanting as they crossed.

They were Tibetans, on their way to the U.N. There was a determined, steadfast anger to their energy, I asked one lady what the significance of the day was and she said they were marching to commemorate the March 10 uprising of 1959 against the invasion by the Chinese.

I thought about how much the Tibetan situation has largely fallen from public view and media coverage. The human rights situation has gotten worse, bringing to question the theory that trade and economic liberalization will bring political liberalization in China and greater respect for human rights. Another thing that struck me was that the Tibetans were marching alone - I didn't see any other colors in the sea of asian faces.

This is from the site: http://www.freetibet.org/

"On 10 March 1959 Tibetan people in Lhasa rose up against China's occupation of Tibet and as a result tens of thousands of innocent Tibetan men, women and children were killed by the occupying Chinese forces. Since then Tibetans have waged a non-violent campaign for freedom from occupation. Don't let the world forget the 46th anniversary of the Tibetan National Uprising."

Interconnection

2005-02-12T23:25:00.000-08:00

Call it what you want, the mind of God, or in the Buddhist tradition, a shared field of consciousness between all living beings. Time flows forward as well as backwards.

Read this amazing article (it gave me goosebumps):

http://www.rednova.com/news/display/?id=126649#121

Renditions

2005-02-09T19:50:00.000-08:00

One of the worst episodes of genocide in modern history happened under the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia (1975-1979). Tens of thousands of innocent people were "processed" (ie: tortured in indescribable ways, forced to write "confessions", then executed) in a secret facility dubbed S-21.

In essence, the logic was simply that if they caught simply a handful of spies amongst the masses, it was enough to justify the deaths of thousands of innocents in order to preserve the security of the Angkor (central organization), led by Pol Pot. All of this happened largely out of the eyes of the world, behind the curtains in one of the most brutal totalitarian regimes modern society has known.

A similiar sort of absolute "means justify the ends" logic is currently at work in Bush's "War on Terror". Read this article from the New Yorker, the magazine that recently broke the news on Abu Ghraib, as well as "a priori" pre-emptive planning for Iraq.

http://www.newyorker.com/fact/content/?050214fa_fact6

Ground Zero

2005-01-18T22:21:00.000-08:00

Started my first assignment today. The client was downtown in World Financial Center 2. This was also the coldest day this winter so far (12 degrees). I tried to sleep standing up on the E train from Queens after a fitful night of non-rest.

At the Chamber's street station, people streaming out of the subway stations converged with the PATH/NJ Transit commuters from across the river. At 8:50am, there was an intensity to this place that rivaled financial districts elsewhere.

There's one line I'll always remember from Henry David Thoreau's Walden: "The majority of men lead lives of quiet desperation". This desperation was papable in the air - there was no joy in this teaming mass grinding their way to another week of cold and stress. And I found myself amongst them.

And yet in the center of these masses like ants circumambulating, there was this gaping, unnatural, negative space. As I rose out of the stairs, out of the subway at the Chambers street station, I was unprepared for the sheer scale of ground zero.

Out of our client's office, the large windows opened into a panoramic view of the WTC complex - and for the first time, I had a primal, ineffable experience of the message Al Quaeda has chosen to bestow upon this epicenter of world financial power. Throughout the day, when we would query our client about this source code or that legacy system, we'd invariably hear things along the lines of, "we lost that during 911. They told us it was backed up but it wasn't".

After work, on the way back to the subway, an african man with an african accent asked me, as he literally stood before ground zero, where the twin towers were. I pointed behind him and said, "There. Its all gone now". For a brief moment, the agony that was very local to the people of this city transcended cultures and oceans and this man wore a hollow, almost inconsolable look before moving on to pace the perimeter.

NY, gets cold

2005-01-15T19:38:00.000-08:00

As I write right now, I'm listening to an album, to a song called "NY, gets cold" by a San Francisco band, For Stars. It brings back memories of my old life in northern california. You could say that in this New York winter, I'm California dreaming.

I went to a concert last night, an old friend who moved out here from San Francisco 2 years ago was performing. His band was called Bula Matari, which means "Breaker of Stones" in some african language. The E train line was cut midtown, I ended up running 30 minutes late and had a to take a cab for the last leg. My cab driver was from Sudan. Unsure what side he was on, I asked him what he thought about what was happening in Darfur. It turns out he was from there and his wife and children were still there. Friends, family, neighbors were suffering unfathomably there, he said in a matter of fact manner. I mentioned the Janjaweed, the government sponsored militia that was responsible for much of the burning of villages, murder and rape of civilians. I wonder how he made it to New York City.

The band was good, all old school hardcore punk. There was one song, called "I hate people", that in a joyous punk way, was very cathartic. I enjoyed the show, though hardcore punk is not my natural genre of preference. I was the only person there to see the band and the ride home was a nightmare and it took me 2 hours. Interesting enough, there was a strip club downstairs from the bandstage where the music was performed.

Today, I played music another friend from my old band. Unlike trying to write electronic music on my own, which is usually tedious and a bit like pulling teeth, the tunes just rolled off our guitars and in an hour we had a rough basis for 2-3 songs. There's something to be said for sitting in a chair, wintery cold outside, and just responding to what someone else is playing.

I started a new job 2 weeks ago. I was feeling restless and needed a little structure to my life eventhough I wasn't sure how long I'd stay in this city (and still don't). People at the office are nice enough but I can sense how things will get stressful, having to adjust to dealing with clients (unlike in the past, where I was mostly focused on building a product). Its never fun to deal with clients.

As my luck would have it, just after I took the offer over Xmas, literally a few days after, I was offered an opportunity to go back to Vietnam to do another volunteer project. And just last week, my volunteer organization wanted to know if I'd be interested in going to Casablanca, Morocco for another project. If I had just waited a litttle longer - my life would be different today. I could always quit now but I guess there's something to be said for making a decision and following it through, but I wonder if in this case, its foolish obstinacy vs. the courage to seize an opportunity. I guess on the bright side, some income would be nice after being away for almost 6 months.

I miss Asia still - as if I left a good part of me there, and a shadow of my self is here now, riding the subways to and fro, a ghost in New York City.

Tsunami

2004-12-27T14:12:00.000-08:00

Everyone's probably seen the footage and heard the news about the earthquake and tsunami in the Indian Ocean /SE Asia region. Here's how one can help:

http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/national/AP-Quake-Aid.html

I guess one of the byproducts of travelling earlier this year is that the news becomes more intimate. These are people and places you've visited not too long ago, infact, had it occurred a mere 2 months earlier, I could have been there, amongst those devastated.

Some related blogs (haven't found stuff closer to the SE Asia side yet):
http://tsunamihelp.blogspot.com/
http://www.worldchanging.com/archives/001806.html

Best of 2004

2004-12-24T17:18:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays!

Films:
Eternation Sunshine of Your Spotless Mind
Motorcycle Diaries
The Dreamers
Before Sunset
2046
Hero
Fog of War

Albums:
Max Richter - The Blue Notebooks
Kings of Convenience - Riot On a Quiet Street
Ulrich Schnauss - A Strangely Isolated Place
Lali Puna - Faking the Books
n.ln - Astronomy for Children
Pan American - Quiet City
Zero 7 - When it Falls
Alburn Lull - Cast from the platform
Mus - Divina Lluz
Bebel Gilberto - Bebel Gilberto
Abida Parveen - Faiz by Abida

---
Sorry haven't been writing much... (just got a bad case of the flu). Thanks to everyone still reading this who made 2004 a memorable year.

December skies

2004-12-10T19:16:00.000-08:00

Its almost the end of the year. I've been staying in a lot - recovering from a cold and taking cover from the grey skies and rain here.

Watched "Motorcycle Diaries" today, which I really enjoyed. It made me think about some of the small transformations I underwent after travelling for a while. I wondered whether I should go back to work soon or pursue something new and impractical/idealistic altogether. It also made me realise how muted some of my idealism has become with age.

Wednesday, I hung out with Michael, with whom I worked with in Vietnam who is also back in the New York area. It also happened to be an anniversery for John Lennon's assasination. We stopped by the little memorial in Central Park near the Dakota apartment building. People were gathered around, singing Lennon and Beatles tunes. In the inner circle, a few people played bass, and strummed along on guitars. I saw what looked like older New Yorkers who were likely hippies during the 60's and 70's. New York needs more hippies. A policeman stood by to watch under a floodlight that was provided for the gathering. A Japanese newsman spoke into the glare of a camera for the fans back home.

Speaking of Vietnam, the first direct service from San Francisco to Saigon commenced this week. A part of me wished I was on that plane.

Map of the U.S.A.

2004-11-30T18:15:00.000-08:00

Speaks for itself...

Key (for map on right):
[Green] Free states and territories
[Brown] Territories open to slavery
[Red] Slave owning states

Hunting tragedy

2004-11-23T14:41:00.000-08:00

There were some sporadic news this week about a hunter in Winsconsin who shot 6 people. On the surface, it was another beserker we often get used to hearing about on American news. It turns out he may have been defending himself.

http://www.wkowtv.com/$spindb.!query.1listnews.storeview.13554.news

The hunter was a Hmong, a traditional tribal people that historically enhabit parts of Laos, Vietnam and southern China - and it made me think of the Hmongs I encountered while I was travelling in asia. They seemed down to earth, laid back people - many ended up in the U.S. as refugees. The U.S. government during the 1960's-70's has had a sad history of exploiting them during their wars in the region - many were trained to fight by the CIA as counter-communist insurgents but ended up being ruthlessly persecuted after the U.S. pullout. Some made it here as refugees.

http://www.jefflindsay.com/Hmong_tragedy.html

Music for travellers

2004-11-10T19:40:00.000-08:00

Saw an interesting quote in a magazine horoscope that went something like:

"One will never be free until there is freedom from the idea of freedom".

Perhaps it is saying something about true freedom as something born of responsibility and discipline.

Been seeing a retinue of old friends in the city as well as friends who moved here from San Francisco. My New York friends are doing well - all have become established in their careers, and getting things done the way New Yorkers know how.

My relocated San Franciscan friends are enjoying life here, some still getting their bearings, (and the neurotic energy of this city has begun to affect some). I took a long walk with my friend Erika, on Sunday night. She had just arrived after spending a few months to drive around the country. The weather was cool but not too cold. Surprisingly, the bars and restaurants were still lively at 10pm. The village and SOHO was just right, not too many people and just enough to not feel too empty.

Two of my ex-band mates from 10 years ago have just released an excellent electronica album: Lexica's "Lost and Left to Be Imagined". It was a surprise to see my name in the liner notes, one of my guitar parts was resurrected, resampled, remixed.

One of the my favorite things to do is now is to listen to music on my mp3 player while walking around the city or taking the subway. Its like a soundtrack to one's own private movie. So many characters everywhere.

I'm listening to Eno's "Music For Airports" right now - good comedown music for tonight.

Tragedy, Comedy, Beauty

2004-11-05T02:30:00.000-08:00

"Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think."

-Margaret Cho

Needless to say, the election results were a huge dissappointment. Its one thing for Americans to suffer this president, its another for the world to suffer. One of the things that I'll always remember from my travels in S.E. Asia was the trail of devastation that terrible American foreign policy left in the region (which many are still recovering from today). I'm afraid something of this order is happening again in Iraq.

Several of my friends who recently returned to the U.S. from travelling or working overseas are now restless to leave again. My sense of alienation from the other half of this country is tremendous. I personally don't feel like I understand this country anymore. 51% of the vote is hardly a mandate, yet Bush is already intoning as if he has sufficient "capital" to push his agenda full on.

Tonight, I went with an old friend to see a show in Brooklyn by the mastermind guitarist, Robin Guthrie, of Cocteau Twins. Although it was just him sitting with his guitar before banks of effect consoles, his signature sublime sound enveloped the room, bringing back memories of better musical times. Its interesting to think that his sound, pioneered over 15 years ago (and partially spawning the personally inspiring dreampop/shoegaze movement), still is more beautiful and progressive than most of the stuff out today. For an hour or so tonight, I felt as if I was in the presence of angels, entranced into a state of heavenly bliss. The world was impossibly beautiful, if just for a little while.

Vote

2004-11-02T01:40:00.000-08:00

People, stop reading this and go vote.

Here are some things to remember about voting. Read carefully. Your vote could decide this election.

1. Find out today where your polling place is by calling your county clerk or checking http://www.mypollingplace.com/
2. Alternatively, call 1-866-MYVOTE1 to find your polling place.
3. Check the hours the polls are open with your city or county clerk.
4. Print the League of Women Voters' card in English or Spanish and put it in your wallet or purse.
5. Bring a government-issued picture ID like a driver's license or passport when you vote. Some states require it but if there are problems, you will certainly need it. If you have a cell phone, take it to call for help if need be.
6. As you enter the polls, note if there is an Election Protection person outside the polling place.
7. If you are not listed as a registered voter, try to register on the spot. Some states allow that.
Otherwise, talk to the Election Protection person if there is one or call 1-866-OUR-VOTE for instructions. If neither of these helps, ask for a provisional ballot, but you will need a picture ID to get one.

[from www.electoral-vote.com]

The world is counting on you.

New York

2004-11-01T15:48:00.000-08:00

I'm back in New York City. This is my birthplace, and also where I went to college. Not sure how long I'll stay but I'm enjoying it so far.

The other day, I was in Rego Park, Queens, getting some tacos. The place was run by a Chinese family, speaking in a fujian dialect and across the restaurant me sat two west africans conversing excitedly in their language when their food arrived. Russian can be heard up and down the sidewalk on the way to the subway, as the neighborhood is traditionally Russian orthodox jewish. Compared to San Francisco, this is a true melting pot, where each ingredient hasn't fully integrated into the stew yet.

It was Holloween this weekend and I met up with some old friends from SF who moved out here. We went to a party in Williamsburg and then in the village. We saw the parade. Then I took the late night subway ride home to Queens.

Its nice this time being back - not as full of mixed emotions like before. I guess I've changed and the city's changed. An old friend from college suggested that I've mellowed out in the last eight years since I've been gone, as if a certain passion/intensity has gone from me.

I think Mark Twain once remarked,

"Don't stay in New York too long, lest it makes you too hard. Don't stay in San Fracisco too long, lest it makes you too soft."

Before Sunset

2004-10-22T17:14:00.000-07:00

Caught a matinee to Richard Linklater's Before Sunset today, the sequal to Before Sunrise (1995). It captured some sentiments lingering from my travels. I found it to be one of the best films I've seen this year.

When you are in your early 20's, you may have met someone you really connected with, but was unable to spend much time with. At that age, you are so full of hope - and perhaps think there will be plenty others to come. In your 30's, you realize that's not the case and you look back on that fateful moment when you shared a brief span of with someone you simply can't forget.

The most powerful moments in the film were the scenes in the boat and in the cab, when Jesse and Celine begin confiding in the relative dissapointments and regrets of their romantic lives. Nine years of longing, regret and missed opportunities bottled and now breaking to the surface. Behind them, the light changes across Paris as the sun sets and you know the inevitable moment will come when they may have to say goodbye once again.

Le jeux sont faits

2004-10-20T22:17:00.000-07:00

Back in highschool, I read a book by Jean-Paul Sartre in French class. The title roughly translates into "The game is up" or "The chips are down". The story goes something like this:

A worker, Pierre, goes to the house of a rich woman, Eve, and does some repairs. They don't speak or know each other. Not long thereafter, Pierre dies from an unrelated accident and the Eve is poisoned by her unfaithful husband. They meet in the afterlife - where the dead have no form and can see the living but are invisible to them. The afterlife is run like a huge bureaucracy.

Pierre and Eve meet in the afterlife and become soulmates. But they cannot consummate their love because they are dead. They appeal to the head bureaucrat of the afterlife - who gives them a deal: we'll send you back to your former lives in the world of the living - if in 24 hours, you can find each other and establish a love, you are free to remain and live out your lives.

The couple is sent back to the world of the living. Inevitably, they fail to find each other, caught up in the web of their former lives. They return to the world of the dead, condemned to remain there forever.

When I was in highschool, I saw the logic of the story in the rigidity and barriers of the social structure, where cliques and social classes often kept people who, in any other circumstance, were potential soulmates. The geek and the cheerleader perhaps would have been soulmates - but they'd never know.

I've been thinking about this story lately as it pertains to travel. A few times in our lives, with some planning and courage, we manage to break free of the grind and do something that recaptures what it means to be alive.

Its a scary, unimaginable thing to just pack up and go for many - but what awaits them is life, pulsing in all its freedom and existential splendor. The people they encounter are those who they would never meet in their former lives - where they are constrained at home by habit, tradition, socio-economic, and perhaps cultural factors.

No matter what situation you have in your life, you always have a choice to be happy and to fully embrace freedom. How we choose to spend our life here is completely up to us.

Misread

2004-10-18T21:56:00.000-07:00

"...How come no-one told me
All throughout history
The loneliest people
Were the ones who always spoke the truth
The ones who made a difference
By withstanding the indifference
I guess it's up to me now
Should I take that risk or just smile?"

(lyrics from Kings of Convenience's song, "Misread", from their latest album, on rotation today in my mp3 player)

Anyways, I'm still sleepless and recovering from the post travel blues. Today I went down to vote early in San Fran's city hall. I'd never been inside - the marble and imposing neo-classical architecture is stunning. The election station in the basement was remarkably well run by friendly staff. According to a staffer that I talked to, morale has been good - post Willie Brown, the last mayor who rankled many with his legions of cronies. They spoke with affection for the outgoing Board of Supervisor Prez, Gonzalez (who I voted for in the last Mayor's race).

People seem to like the new mayor Gavin Newsom, who won notoriety across America for marrying gay couples in city hall. Where else do you have a straight, catholic white male mayor (with a lawyer wife who used to pose as a lingerie model) stick his neck up for gay people? San Francisco of course.

I walked around the building and stumbled upstairs to an inaugural ceremony in progress for 4 city commissioners. I was out of place with my tee shirt, jeans and backpack - and feared that I would be asked to leave or something. Everyone else was dressed in suits - but the atmosphere was open and warm. The mayor came out, hair slicked back, looking dapper and in his gruff voice, lead each commissioner in the oath statement. Right behind the ceremony area was the door to the Mayor's office, as if anyone with a grievance could walk right in.

I left feeling good about this city.

Blue Desert

2004-10-18T01:34:00.000-07:00

Watched the film "Japanese Story" on DVD today with Michelle, a sympathetic friend who had spent 8 months travelling around the world last year.

Here's the synopsis.

The film, to me, is about how people can fall in love and open their heart to others (who are so different) when removed from the constraints of culture and in the open expanse of nature.

Being back in San Francisco, I'm reminded of the games people play and the complex motivations and considerations surrounding meeting others. Travelling far away from home, you get used to opening your heart and trusting your instincts.

I guess I have some readjusting to do.

Jetlagged in SF

2004-10-16T20:52:00.000-07:00

Back in San Francisco and arrived on a downcast day - coldest its been here all year. The city is still familiar - as if I haven't been gone all that long. Its been almost six months.

I feel really sad. Homesick is the best way to describe it, but for Asia. I feel disconnected from everything here. Friends and strangers don't understand you and are living out the very lives they lived when I left, as if in a time capsule. Its true, its always worse the first few days when you get back to where you came from - the sadness sometimes doesn't fade for months. And the longer you've been away, the longer it takes. I'm also sad because my father is getting older in Taiwan and I can't be closer to him, for now.

Walked around the Mission today and caught up with some old friends yesterday. Everyone and everything's the same - those who are single are still lamenting how hard it is to meet the right people and property prices in the city are rising from already ridiculous prices to even more ludicrous prices ($700K for a 2 bedroom!?).

Sleep has not been easy. I'm couchsurfing and last night I kept sneezing from my friend's cat. I laid awake trying to also fight back anxiety over what to do next. The repercussions of each choice gets heavier as one gets older. I'm now almost 31, and the choices I make now seems to weigh significantly upon the choices I will have in 5 or 10 years.

I'm mulling a job offer back in Hanoi. Vietnam sounds sweet - but I worry that if I end up settling there it will be all that much harder to get back. There are stories of long term expats who are stuck in foreign countries, forever unable to readapt at home. But San Francisco right now feels like an old movie I've watch too many times.

Hsinchu, Taiwan

2004-10-09T23:19:00.000-07:00

I've been vegging hard - eating, sleeping, watching the presidential debates as well as the bundle of DVD's I'd bought in Hanoi for $1 a piece (shhh). I'm staying at my father's place in a small town in the countryside of Taiwan. I'd lived here for 3 years when I was around the formulative age of 4 - when my parents moved back here from the U.S. before they'd split up.

The other day, I biked along a winding road outside of town. When I was 5 or so, I'd taken this road with a friend as far as we'd dared to the next town. The next town seemed as far away as another planet back then. Today, it is a 7 kilometer ride along green mountains, a rocky river, a tunnel and rice fields. Not much has changed in all these years and you can still see farmers planting and working on their land.

I visited my uncle and mother (who happened to also be visiting Taiwan) at my grandparents old house in Hsinchu yesterday - which is a city about 30 minutes outside of my father's town. The city has changed so much - I walked along a newly built riverside commericial district with cafes, restaurants, shops and huge department stores looming overhead. Bands were performing at night to cheering groups of kids in public squares. Couples were having quiet conversations on benches along the river. Much of it could pass for parts of Tokyo with its modern architecture and girls wearing funky knee high socks and boys with the latest hair styles.

Saw an interesting quote from a friend's blog:

"When traveling there are 2 paths...
one of nostalgia for home
and one for the adventure which lies ahead"

2046

2004-10-03T23:16:00.000-07:00

I caught Wong Kar Wei's new film, 2046, today at the Warner Village theater in Hsinchu, Taiwan, with my father. The film just opened in Asia this weekend, and is not due to hit theaters in the U.S. until next year. These days, directors from Sophia Coppola to Scorcese have acknowledged his influence in their work.

The film is flawed but still very much vintage Wong Kar Wei, from the gorgeous "every shot as a painting" Chris Doyle cinematography, the poignant voice overs, the plot in service of mood. The first 3rd of the film felt overly fragmented and at times, I thought my favorite director was losing his edge. The film then began to coelesce, cohere into a singular mood piece, somekind of paean to impossible and fleeting love. The sci-fi parts didn't work for me but the 1960's Hong Kong parts, largely a continuation of "In the Mood For Love", were affecting and often, I felt like I was watching someone else's dream. The film stars many of Chinese cinema's current lumineries including Tony Leung Cheu Wai, Gong Li, Zhang Zhiyi, and Faye Wong (who got her screen debut in Wong's Chungking Express).

The film was a salve for my travel weary heart, grown melancholy of late with the passage of people and places.

S.E. Asia Reading List

2004-10-02T13:28:00.000-07:00

Here are some good books I read while travelling which are related to the region. Depending one how one feels about such things, they can be bought for $2-3 in pirated form (locally photocopied, w/ sleeves faithfully duplicated). Listed by country:

Vietnam:

Sorrow of War - Bao Ninh
One of the few books on the war from the Vietnam perspective available in English. A gripping novel loosely based on the author's experiences as a young soldier who survived multiple campaigns on the North Vietnamese side and lived to write about it. Particularly interesting is a fleeting portrait of old Hanoi, before the communists had taken over, as a place where free spirits still had a place. Ninh's voice is deeply human and brings home the truth that war destroys all, including the victors. Should be required reading in American classrooms.

The Quiet American - Graham Greene
Novel recently made into a Hollywoor movie about Vietnam during the French colonial occupation. Although largely a white man's fantasy (with the docile Vietnamese plaything thrown in), it is entertaining and includes prescient insight into american foreign policy in the region as a deadly mix of naiviete, incompetence and arrogance.

Shadows and Wind - Robert Templer
A profile of contemporary Vietnam, including detailed inner workings of party politics and the recent economic "doi moi" progress. Highly critical of various government officials. I'm surprised this was freely available to tourists on the streets of Hanoi.

If I Die in a Combat Zone - Tim O'Brien
Good companion piece to Bao Ninh's work, from the American perspective. A memoir of a college student who is drafted and sent to fight in the jungles of Vietnam. Particularly insightful are the depiction of sado-masochistic military training and references to Greek philosophy on the definition of courage. Too often, "courage" is an empty word thrown around by politicians and shallow patriots. In the classic greek concept, wisdom and moderation are also key ingredients in courage.

In Retrospect - Robert McNamara
Definitive analysis by the ultimate inside man who served as Secretary of Defense under Kennedy and Johnson during the Vietnam war. Reads like a national nightmare - all the more so because the Bush administration is repeating almost every mistake in Iraq these guys made in Vietnam.

Cambodia:

The Gate - Francois Bizot
Memoir by perhaps the only european survivor of Pol Pot's regime. The author was imprisoned, tortured, interrogated by the Khmer Rouge, released just before the fall of Phnom Penh. During the fall of the city, he had to frantically coordinate the evacuation of the remaining international community in the capital. This book kept me up half the night as it was impossible to put down.

Off the Rails in Phnom Penh Into the Dark Heart of Guns, Girls, and Ganja - Amit Gilboa
Highly entertaining and disturbing travelogue about expat life in Phnom Penh in the late 1990's. The expats Gilboa chronicles lead a dissolute life of brothels, heroin, guns. Also includes excellent accounts of the political transition, mafioso maneuverings of Cambodia's current leader, Hun Sen and the failures/excesses of the U.N. presence.

Voices from S-21 - David Chandler
Detailed analysis and account of Pol Pot's secret interogation, prison and processing center for the killing fields. Chandler is a professor of S.E. Asian studies and this book is on the academic side. Interesting are the links he draws between Pol Pot's policies and Chinese Communists' own dark cultural revolution as well as analyses from a wide range of disciplines, including Marxist ideology, psychology, contemporary behavioral research, and Cambodia's ancient history. If there was a hell on earth, S-21 has to be one of them.

A History of Cambodia - David Chandler
An academic treatment of Cambodia's history, from the glorious Angkor period to the recent U.N. monitored elections.

Laos:

Another Quiet American - Brett Dakin
An excellent account of life as an expat in Vientiane, Laos. Dakin spent 2 years there as a consultant to the state tourism ministry - and he covers a wide range of issues and characters that he came across. The book is fresh enough that many of the people and places Dakin illustrates still inhabit Vientiane today. One of those books that manages a good balance between the factual and personal.

Regional:

Sex Slaves - Louise Brown
Sobering multi-pronged analysis of the sex trade in South and South East Asia. Brown courageously tackles many difficult issues surrounding the trafficking of women today in the region. The material she unearths is so disturbing that, understandably, she often let's her emotions get in the way of her objectivity.

Travel:

Lonely Planet Unpacked - Lonely Planet
Entertaining collection of real life disaster stories by people working for the ubiquitous independent travel guide.

The Alchemist - Paul Koelho
Perhaps you're feeling a little lost in your travels or perhaps you are travelling in search of something spiritual. This book provides some inspiration on the importance of following one's dreams.

Back in Hanoi

2004-10-01T20:30:00.000-07:00

In the late 1980's, Hanoi was one of the most closed and secretive of cities in the world. Travel there entailed difficult-to-obtain official permission, ever present minders/surveillance, and often rough detention and deportation if you fell out of favor with the local authorities.

Today, Hanoi is on its way to reclaim a part of its former glory as the "Paris of Indochina". It is a dense city population-wise, bustling with renewed economic activity. Feels smaller and more provincial than Saigon (with its wider boulevards) and parts of the city can be a maddening maze of people and motorbikes. It is historically, the cultural and political heart of Vietnam. A friendly smile from a stranger is harder to elicit here as people are more conservative and perhaps are still coming to grips with what to make of the influx of foreign tourists (aside from regarding them as walking ATMs).

I lived for 3 months in this city from May to July for my volunteer project - and came to like it for all its charms and imperfections. This is where I find myself again after all my travels, as a point of departure from the region. This week, the city was hosting the Asian Europe Summit. Sidewalks were rebuilt, new street lamps were installed, and motorcades could be seen doing trial runs, horns blazing, through the impossibly thick traffic. It is a sad fact that this regime doesn't seem to put money into improving the infrastructure of the city until a few foreign dignitaries are slated to arrive.

It's nice to see old friends and familiar faces again (after after all the unfamiliar faces and fleeting friendships of the backpacker's life). I hung out at an old office where my project counterpart used to work and access the internet with our Vietnamese friends. Another night, we hung out with an assortment of european expats working at various NGO and UN projects. I practiced spanish with a woman from the north of Spain (and got slapped for playfully calling her "una chica caliente"). We ended the evening at some "Bia Hoi's" (beer cafes) in the old quarter - where one drinks local draught beer sitting on cheap plastic stools on the sidewalk, watching the street life go by.

Winding down

2004-09-28T13:25:00.000-07:00

I'm coming to the last few days of travel and am back in Saigon. Took a flight from Vientiane to Saigon with a short stopover in Phnom Penh - which had surprisingly posh airport terminals with good bookstores (uncensored newspaper selections), shops and cafes.

Bought a CD of classical Cambodian music - which I'd heard one evening on the riverfront near the Royal Palace in Phnom Penh. The music blew me away - it was like a combination of tabla-esque drumming with circular Balinese-like bell instruments (that enclosed the player) and complemented by a xylophone like instrument. The musicians would be given donations by people on the way to make their offerings at a temple.

Enjoyed the Saigon nightlife more this time around (perhaps because I didn't have to get up at 7am to catch a bus or tour). Something about Saigon reminds me of Taipei - my friend Ly and I had a late night snack of seafood noodles on a streetside stand. A lot of people were out, and the city still seemed to be humming with youthful energy. While Hanoi is more picturesque (with its french colonial remnants) perhaps, I've always seemed to connect with Saigonese more easily.

I went to the Ben tham market to a fave restaurant, Nam Giao. Its hard to find, since its tucked away from view inside a courtyard (accessible via an alley). The place serves amazing crab paste noodles and several rice paste dishes. A feast could be had for 2-3 dollars. One the way back, I hired a cyclo to my hotel. I've always had a soft spot for cyclo drivers. After the war, the North Vietnamese, in a show of vindictiveness (and perhaps taking a cue from their Communist Chinese counterparts) forbade many professionals (doctors, lawyers etc) from working in their trained fields - the only work they were allowed to do was to be a cyclo driver. This was likewise the fate of many who were sympathetic to the Americans or served in the South Vietnamese army. The cyclo is a like a rickshaw/bycycle combination - that requires an inordinate amount of skill and stamina to peddle through the chaotic traffic of Saigon. It is a real anachronism in this day of motorbike taxis and air-conditioned metered taxis.

My cyclo driver, who was glad to have my hard won business, noted that in his opinion, the real money was in Hanoi. Saigon only seems more modern because the rich from the north (who got their wealth from party connections and subsequent corruption) poured money in developing hotels, restaurants and shopping centers in Saigon. The man on the street, he noted with dark irony, were better off when the Americans were still here.

Today, I'm catching a flight back to Hanoi to pick up a few things and see old friends before flying to Taiwan friday for some family engagements. The mixed emotions that accompany the end of travels (for now) and uncertainty towards the future is barely containable.

Lao Issara

2004-09-25T22:23:00.000-07:00

["Free Lao"]

Today was museum day - and I hopped on a Tuk-Tuk and headed for Kaysone's house, about a few kilometers from Vientiane's city center. Kaysone is remembered as a preeiminent leader of the resistance and subsequent communist movement, which eventually linked up with other regional Indochina anti-colonial movements (such as the Vietminh), and is regarded as the founder of the country. Yet unlike his counterparts in Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh) or China (Mao), the state apparatus seems to have not spent as much resource promoting his cult. His picture today graces some of the currency - the Kip.

No one else seemed to be at the house - as there was no other tuk tuks outside. I greeted the guard at the guardhouse, an affable 30 something man, and explained that I was interested in visiting Mr. Kaysone's house. He asked what nationality I was and when I explained I was American, he asked to see my passport. I didn't bring it with me so I showed him my California driver's license. He smiled, made a phone call, and indicated the place was closed.

He mentioned something about staff sleeping at the moment. My tuk tuk driver came over and chatted with him a bit. When we took off (not before the guard offered to warmly shake my hand), the tuk tuk driver explained that there was currently no electricity in the house and was therefore closed. Apparently, the house is located in a compound the americans had built when occupying the city during the 60's before abandoning it as part of their withdrawal from the region. Kaysone occupied it after Lao forces regained control of the city. The compound was apparently modelled roughly like an american suburb with tract homes and lawns and such. Inside supposedly was Kaysone's affects such as his yoga mat, french language magazines that showed the man behind the revolution.

Next stop, we headed for the Revolutionary Museum - a massive white building with Soviet styled sculptures of proletariat aiming guns and tools against imaginary imperialist forces. The guard here said it was closing for lunch break (even though it was only 11:15). I managed to convince him to let me in for 5 minutes and dashed off into the building. All the signs were in Lao - so it was hard to follow the narrative. The displays were similiar to the Ho Chih Minh Museum in Saigon and depicted the formation of the resistance and subsequently the communist party and the struggles against the French and then the US. The latter part of the exhibit depicted industrial products (Beer Lao, pharmaceuticals, household goods) that were being produced in Lao today.

In the afternoon, I met up with several Irish backpackers with whom I'd travelled with the day before, and we headed off to the National History Museum. The museum showed artifacts from pre-historical times to the present and had an photographic displays on Lao history in the past 100 years. Particulary interesting were photographs of French officials awaiting to leave after their defeat (smoking pipes in knee high socks with cultivated non-chalance as if at a country club), caves where the Pathet Lao leaders had found refuge from american bombing (which were remarkably outfitted with communications gear and electricity), and photos of American GI's and local protests in Vientiane and against American presence. A glass case showed a macabre set of bomblets, mines, and UXO the Americans left behind (which today still kills and maims many in the countryside).

The story of modern Lao is the same story repeated throughout the region: Western powers such as France, Britain, Japan compete to establish colonies. Exploitation and repression of native populations and resources leads to the development of native nationalism. Moderate nationalist forces are unable to effectively oust foreign occupiers (or are co-opted by Americans). More radical forces, utilizing Communist ideology and built with support from the countryside wage a more effective campaign to win the hearts and minds of the population and defeat foreign imperialists. Americans intervene and occupy, fearing the rise of Communism and the domino effect. Americans prop up corrupt and inept regimes to fight against communism, completely out of touch with the sentiment of the local population and ignorant of the fact that regional communism was ultimately used as a nationalistic tool (and had little to do with proletariats and what not). Americans withdrawl, their puppet regimes collapse. Country is unified or declared fully independent.

This pattern started with China, with our support of the corrupt Chiang Kai Shek (and their subsequent flight to Taiwan), in South Vietnam with the corrupt and reviled President Diem (who was ultimately assasinated by his own generals), in Laos and elsewhere. Unfortunately, with no mechanisms such as freedom of press, protection of human rights or multi-party elections to safeguard against absolute power and corruption, these victorious governments quickly decayed into autocratic, repressive regimes with ailing economies. Some would say that the Americans really did ultimately win the war - as evidenced by these countries' eagerness today to adopt free markets and consumer lifestyles.

When I saw Prime Minister Allawi of Iraq speak to the U.S. Congress this week on BBC about the successes of Iraq, I couldn't help but think of an observation the former U.S. Defense Secretary Mcnamara made in his book "In Retrospect" regarding the Vietnam war. He noted that one of the problems of Vietnam was that the US government was constantly getting a rosy picture from the South Vietnamese government, who were under our pay and eager to keep the dough flowing. The reality on the ground was that the Viet Cong was recruiting more people than we could kill and successfully penetrating deep into the South. The timing of Allawi's speech was suspicious as well - perhaps staged to confront an ever growing unease about the Bush Administration's complete bungling of the Iraq reconstruction during a critical election period.

---

Tonight, I was invited by the Lao projectionist at the French Language Center to view one of his films made during the 70's for the Pathet Lao resistance. I watched a video of his film as he was busily attending to the massive projectors - showing a repeat of thursday's film, "Peut-Etre". He looked pretty much the same some 30 years ago, with the same intense gaze and mustache. The film, shot in black and white, was all in Lao, which kept me from understanding the dialog but the general gist of the story was not hard to follow.

The film opened with scenes of country life in a village: a family going about their farming, quiet scenes of gathering around their teak house living room to eat a traditional meal of sticky rice, soup and vegetables. Later in the film, a rambunctious group of well uniformed Lao soldiers (who were funded and aligned with the Americans), broke into the village with their machine guns and arrested the men and several of the women. The projectionist played a spy who worked for the Lao collaborators. The film culminated with advancing resistance fighters rescuing a woman from the spy. Interesting were some of the scenes of vintage Vientiane nightlife, where Lao bands played beatle-esque pop songs and young men and women shaking tail. I was later to learn that one of the beautiful leading actresses in the film eventually became his wife.

Today there is no film industry in Lao. When you're recovering from fighting for the last 100 years to free your country, other concerns are more pressing. As the american author Fitzegerald once noted, "culture follows money" (as evidenced by the global rise of post-war America in modern art, music and film). Hopefully, the Lao will rise again and regain their voice.

Cinema Francaise

2004-09-24T15:09:00.000-07:00

Last night, I had this incredible craving for chinese dumplings after reading about a place in Vientiane called "Liang Niang" from Brett Dakin's book. I managed to find the restaurant, after talking in mandarin with a few chinese shop owners in town. The restaurant seemed remodeled, no longer the small shack described in the book.

The shrimp and chives dumplings and seaweed salad was excellent - as the owners are immigrants from a town north of Beijing. Most of the customers were other Chinese immigrants in town and all seemed to order up a good amount of food and ate fast. The young man who managed the place (perhaps the son of the owners), was pleasant and I was relieved to be able to clear up some order issues with him in his native tongue.

Afterwards, I made my way to La Centre pour La Language Francaise near the French Embassy. Brett's book had mentioned that they showed movies on thursday nights. I found my way to the screening room after getting directions in my really rusty French (full of inaccurate verb conjugations but the Lao staff was merciful). The movie was "Peut-Etre". I only caught the last half but the story is something like this: a young couple goes to a Y2K party in Paris. They are thinking of having a baby but the man writes off the idea as impossible. For some reason (that I missed due to being late), some kind of time/space drug induced portal in the apartment?, he ends up in the future, in a sand filled version of Paris and meets his son, daughter and their family. They all beg him to make children with his wife. He refuses and the 2 realities collide. The film was really enjoyable and included a performance by the aging Jean Paul Belmundo, hardly recognizable in the film from his Godard days.

Afterwards, I chatted with the projectionist, an soft spoken old Lao man who was once a movie star some 20 years ago, who acted in old Pathet Lao (resistence fighter) propaganda films. While this man was forgotten by Lao society today, the French employed him in their cinema, in a small way perhaps honoring his legacy. The French, for all their mistreatment of people in the region does play a small part in sustaining cultural activities today in their former colonies. When I was living in Hanoi, the French Cultural Center had put on an amazing music festival, in one venue combining various stages where traditional classical Vietnamese music, folk as well as live experimental local electronic acts performed.

Vientiane

2004-09-22T21:37:00.000-07:00

I've arrived at the capital and largest city of Laos last night - Vientiane. Its a sleepy place as far as cities go, everything closes down around 11pm and there are perhaps 2 main streets of interest - all part of the charm I suppose. I had an excellent baguette sandwich and iced coffee for breakfast at a place around the corner from my guesthouse - one of the few good things the French left behind (as well as a large number of restaurants). Watched CNN last night - same dispiriting situation in the middle east, Iraq and disingenous politics (esp. from the Carl Rove cabal) in the US.

Watching the latest news about terrorist bombings got me thinking about how culture and religion can often shape a people's response to historical injustices (percieved or otherwise). America has now unwillingly engendered new generations of jihadists eager to wage holy war because of, as the argument goes, its foreign policies in the region (biased support for Isreal, occupation in Iraq etc).

In Laos, the most heavily bombed country in history (by the US for that matter), I've encountered none (if any) bitterness, in the local people I've come across, towards Americans or people from former countries who were their colonial masters. They seem eager to move on, catch up, rise out of poverty and enjoy the fruits of their labor and peace. In Laos, where many men spend a good part of their youth in the sangha (monastic community) as a novice, perhaps Buddhism has endowed its people with a sense of peace that comes from understanding the value of letting go. There is a practical value to forgiveness and certainly, letting go doesn't mean forgetting. This is a common theme in Vietnam as well - which is in the midst of high economic growth.

A few things I've learned from chatting up locals recently:

-only the well-to-do can today afford to go to university, where teachers often demand bribes for grades and entrance. For many, service as a monk is often the only structured, free education they'll recieve.
-few opportunities exist for most young people. Most cannot go to school, or end up becoming disillusioned by the system and end up going back to work on the family farm or doing odd jobs.
-economic opportunity is heavily skewed towards people with government connections. One man in Vang Vieng pointed out that all the guesthouses and businesses there and elsewhere were started by members of government or people who have family/social connections with people in power.
-the police is corrupt and uneducated. They often stop people on motorbikes for reason, to demand bribes and browbeat to throw their power around. This has been my personal experience in Vietnam as well.
-it is widely held perception that a large percentage of foreign development aid is siphoned into pockets of local officials.
-many in the tourism business seem to share a common wariness for Isreali tourists (seems common in other countries I've travelled as well) - who strike them as rude and arrogant relative to all the others. One local man told a story of how one Isreali blurted out that he can act however he wanted because they had the most powerful country behind them (USA). [my tax money at work!]
-Thailand and Laos share many cultural and linguistic traits. In fact, Thai pop and TV are readily consumed by Laos. However, the Thais often look down on their Laotion neighbors. One man who went to find work across the border said that one lady remarked: "How can you speak english so well? You are from Laos!".
-People don't have a good sense of what is really going on in their own country (as there is no free press). My guidebook, printed less than a year ago, cited the exchange rate as 8000kip~1USD. Today the exchange rate is about 10800 to 1. Thats quite a change in a short period of time.

One man I encountered explained things from a local perspective. While things may be terribly wrong, and the political system was broken and authoritarian and there wasn't much they could do to change things (at the risk of being imprisoned), he sought to find contentment within, in the simple things like family, friendship, nature and to try to simply be happy.

One expat who lived in the region compared Thailand to Laos in this way, "In Thailand most simply pay lip service to Buddhism while some seem to still live it here".

Vang Vieng

2004-09-20T21:56:00.000-07:00

Took the 7 hour bus along winding misty mountain roads to Vang Vieng, a town halfway between Luang Prabang and Vientienne. The town is small, lots of backpackers, and surrounded by looming karst mountains, a bit like Halong Bay, Vietnam but without the bay. Once you get out of the Khaosan Rd-esque ghetto of "happy" shakes and pizza and their stoned victims, you're in the midst of some of the most beautiful, unspoilt countryside.

Yesterday, I went kyaking, caving and treking with a bunch of brazilians, a brit and a spaniard. The highlight was swimming and climbing through "Sleeping Cave", named so because over 200 people took refuge in the cave from bombing during the fighting against the french and then the americans. We also stopped by an organic farm to try a round of mullberry shakes and took turns jumping into the river from a platform along a stop. I've reclaimed my inner country boy for today.

After being kept up half the night night by a bunch of loud Isrealis outside my $4/night room in town, I checked into a bungalow on the riverbank with an awesome view of the mountains - a really plush place with hardly anyone around except an old Lao man who was clacking away on his typewriter on his balcony. I learned later that he was a famous Lao writer who was notable not only for his work but also for never finishing university. His motto was that his wife was his university.

Today, I found a copy of Paul Koelho's "The Alchemist" in a tatty used bookstore in town where the staff did not speak english. Never read anything by him but noticed his books wherever there were backpackers. I spend the afternoon reading along the river, listening to the Rachels' "Music for Egon Schiel" on my mp3 player before the rains came.

Luang Prabang

2004-09-16T14:09:00.000-07:00

A few days have seem to flown by in this town.

I spend the first lounging around L'Etranger bookshop, the only english bookstore in town, reading from their lending library. I also caught a film they were showing in the evening, Central Station, a brazilian film that was remarkably poignant and rich in its dramatic twists and turns. One of the side effects of extended travel is that some days, you just want to do nothing.

Tuesday, thousands of Lao from all the surrounding regions gathered for the annual boat racing festival. The town was filled with vendors selling Lao snacks, cloths, prize booths and apparently this is one of the biggest festivals for many in the area. Teams 30 or so men in colorful caps and T-shirts rowed long boats and competed. The races lasted all afternoon and it was hard to get a good view on the river bank but we managed to find a restaurant overlooking the starting line. Around sunset, the winning team paraded down the main street with their trophies in hand and singing jubilant songs.

Yesterday, I took a kyaking trip about 2 hours north of Luang Prabang. One of Lao's riches assets is its unspoilt natural beauty. We rowed about 23 km, for 4 hours down the river and braved some class 2-3 rapids. I got tossed at one point but it was refreshing to take a dip in the river and the skilled Lao guides kept us out of trouble. Along each side were spectacular misty mountains, and pristine lush forests dotted by the occasional village or fishing canoe.

It rained during lunch so we took shelter under a hut in a small village. The children in the village kept us company while we ate and 2 dogs fought over scraps that our guide toss out. Everywhere we went, small children would wave and smile. Children in Lao, while poor, seemed happier to their counterparts in Cambodia or Vietnam. In Cambodia, one is often hounded by poor children begging or selling trinkets - the poverty seems desperate. In Laos they were seen happily playing amongst themselves, pausing to wave at the occasional passing tourist, without agenda.

Of the 4 countries I've visited in the region, the Laotian that I've encountered have been the most down to earth, friendly and guileless. This is a testament to the character of its people as recent Lao history has been marred by colonialism, warfare and heavy handed power politics by its neighbors to the east and west.

Laos is also the most heavily bombed country in human history. The U.S. dropped 2 times as many bombs on Laos as in all of the Korean War. During the U.S.-Vietnam war, the U.S. conducted a covert, illegal operation to root out Viet Cong that were infiltrating northern Laos in an effort to seek sanctuary and establish alternate supply routes. Rural Laotians were caught in the cross fire and as a result, many continue to be maimed by mines and UXO (unexploded ordinances) in the countryside today. According to active deminng agencies, it will take another 100 years to clear the country at the present rate.

Today, Laos is still officially communist. Its original party leadership came out of radicalized movements for independence and freedom from foreign domination - a common pattern in the region. However, unlike Cambodia, its leaders were more pragmatic and quickly abandoned stifling, repressive practices such as collective farming and realized that a relaxed political posture was key to gaining foreign developmental aid. Corruption exists and today, the far north is a flashpoint for anti-government insurgency by the tribal Hmong minority. Just today in the Bangkok Post, there was an artical about a video smuggled out of the country that allegedly shows several dead teenagers that were victims of a government raid on a Hmong village.

On the way back to town from kyaking, we saw a group of Hmong men in their dark blue traditional vests. They toted long rifles. They smiled cheerfully and seemed to gesture to us that there was nothing to worry about. Our Lao guide noted that they were merely on a hunting mission.

A good account of contemporary Laos is Brett Dakin's "Another Quiet American" (not to be confused with Graham Greene's work of fiction). The author recounts his experience of graduating from Princeton and then working (as a volunteer consultant) in the Touris, Ministry in Vientienne. The cast of characters from all walks of life he illustrates paintd a rich picture of the dynamics and issues of contemporary Lao.

Young Lao

2004-09-13T13:11:00.000-07:00

Arrived in Luang Prabang, Laos around dusk on a noisy propeller plane from Chiang Mai. From the plane, Lao seemed a verdant, sparsely populated land with mountains, the occassional village and the ever present Mekong river that winds through the landscape like a brown serpent.

Going into town, I saw a golden temple with a shining stupa, illuminated on a hilltop, visible from all parts of the town in the evening. I could hear once again the sounds of insects chirping and away from the main streets, smell country air.

After checking in to my guesthouse not far from the center, I grabbed a simple lao vegetarian dinner (tofu, morning glory, and roasted sea moss) on the main night market strip near the Royal Museum and walked around the riverfront.

It was too dark to tour the sites, so I eventually wandered over to The Hive, a place my guidebook made out to be a rather interesting, albeit out of place lounge with electronic music. The Hive was devoid of customers but I chatted with the Lao staff - who were down to earth and friendly. The one who seemed to be in charge was from the rural north and had spent 7 years as a monk, studying Sanskrit and Pali (contemporary language of Buddha's time in northern India). He nodded in recognition with the Pali/Vipassana terms I'd mentioned, such as Annichea (the law of impermanence, whereby all phenomena arise and pass away, including all pleasure and pain) and Anapana (a meditation technique for concentrating the mind using observation of the breath). I'd come to be familiar with them from a Vipassana course I'd taken a few years ago in the US.

For many rural Lao of simple means, the Sangha, or the monastic community, was a place where free education was available (and often where english lessons were taught). Doing time as a monk significantly added to the respect one gained in his village and was a way to gain merit (positive karma) for the monk and his family. Infact everyone who worked at the Hive had at one time or another donned the saffron robes. Their english was amazingly good.

He acknowledged that he's felt somewhat lost, working in a French-Canadian owned bar, surrounded by alcohol, high concept decor, and the latest eccentric music from the West. He missed the life of monk where once studied ancient discourses, meditated, woke at 4am, and collected alms at 6am, chanted sutras at 6 in the evening. The newest member of the staff was going to university during the day and working during the evenings - he made 8,000 kip or about 80 cents a night working there.

They were leaving early as there were no customers and invited me along to go to a local disco. We took a detour on their motorbikes to avoid a police checkpoint through quiet, rustic streets (they didn't have the proper papers for their bikes) and found our way to a large white tacky building ringed with Chrismas lights. Inside were Lao youth dancing away to a frenetic techno music imported from Thailand. The style altered every few songs or so and soon, the crowd began to dance the slow, wrist turning style of traditional Lao dancing. Not long after, a live band performed some Lao ballads and the entire dance floor lined up to perform a synchronized group dance that reminded me of a very slow version of the funky chicken (except done with a hundred or so people at once). Things took a jarring turn when the DJ changed the genre once again and played a song by Dr. Dre - West coast gangsta could not be more of out of place here in the midst of gentle Lao youth (where the couples are hesitant to show affection in public) - but they really got into the heavy bass, beats and plucky, dingy melody that seems to afflict commercial hip hop these days.

By law, all commercial establishments close at midnight and before soon, we left. I was dropped off at my guesthouse and dozed off to the effects of Beer Lao.

Travelling American

2004-09-08T21:07:00.000-07:00

Its been raining hard the last few nights - so I'm chilling out and catching up on email tonight. Today we learned to work on the back, neck and head in massage class. When I finished my routine, my practice partner, a tall, english girl from Glastonbury had to be roused from a light slumber.

I ran into 2 young Mormon americans on the main road to the temples tonight. They were from Utah and wore the customary white shirts and name tags. It's always nice running into americans - even if they are trying to proseletize. At first they called out to me in Thai, then they remarked how good my english was before they realized I was american. They seemed homesick and were having a tough time finding converts in a country where Buddhism has had over a thousand years of deep influence in the culture and traditions.

On the topic of Americans, people in the region (and most of the world for that matter) often have a hard time differentiating between national identity and ethnic background. A typical conversation goes like this:

local: "Where are you from?"
me: "America."
local: "But you look like [substitute local asian country], same same. Not like American."
me: "No I am American. My family is from Taiwan."

It usually isn't until I mention Taiwan that the incredulous look starts to fade - in their minds, that is my national identity. When I ask what an American looks like, the answer invariably refers to a caucasion. I guess years of exposure to american movies/media with paltry asian american representation has reinforced the concept. In some ways, my experience perhaps parallels asian americans living in parts of middle america, where asians, even if their families have been there for generations, are regarded as perpetual foreigners. Sad since if there is a place where a nation is founded upon an idea, and not a race - its America - the land of refugees.

Americans on the backpacking trail are rare. Even rarer still are solo asian american backpackers. We had an interesting conversation during lunch - the others at my table (who come from europe, india, middle east) also remarked how few americans they encounter travelling. Before tonight, I could count on 1 hand the number of americans I've encountered travelling in the region in the past few months. Is it because Europeans get 4-6 weeks of legally mandated vacation time per year (vs 2 weeks for us)? You can travel reasonable comfortably for $10-15 a day (incl. room/board) in most of the region (so cost should not be an excuse). All the american travellers I've encountered are working, middle class or recent graduates.

Perhaps if americans travelled more, we would think twice about bombing other countries (who don't directly threaten us) and perhaps modify our concept of collateral damage.

Massage School

2004-09-06T21:05:00.000-07:00

Today I learned just how much work it takes to be a traditional Thai masseur. Definately much easier to take than to give. Also, dealing with all sorts of personalities must be a real challenge for a professional. Intention is so important as it shapes the kind of energy you exude and consequently the quality of the experience the person recieving the massage experiences. Thai massage goes back over a thousand years to Indian, Chinese and indigenous traditional medicine - interesting concepts about energy lines and wind channels.

The other day, I finally made to an authentic Muay Thai boxing program at the Chiang Mai Boxing Stadium. There were 7 bouts in all for several weight categories. I tried to sneak in for 100 baht, posing as a local Thai (the Thai local in front of me paid 100) before I was called back in english and asked to pay the tourist fee (400). The traditions, such as the music and the ceremonial dance and the wais (bows) to your opponent, audience and judges keep what is otherwise a primal, viscerally violent sport within civilized bounds. The sound of flesh being pounded by shins, knees, gloved fists and the way each fighter gathers momentum towards the latter rounds was a revelation. The use of kicks, knees, elbows to the head and throws make Thai boxing more damaging than regular boxing. I kept wondering what Hemmingway would of thought of all this - if he would have found greater beauty in Thai boxing.

The final match was the heavy weight class and it was between a Thai and a Finnish boxer (who by his adornments, was the defending champion). There was a roudy bunch of white men and their Thai girlfriends who formed several rows of support behind the Fin's corner. In the Thai boxer's corner, there was his young wife and his daughter and 2 assistants, who couldn't have been more than 20, who watered him down between rounds. The audience was mixed of locals, expats and tourists - the whole time I couldn't figure out who the locals were cheering for and I wondered if their support for one of their own was muted by the bets they had placed against him.

The Thai landed a series of solid punches against the Fin in the first 2 rounds. The Fin's face began to swell, and you could tell just a couple more would have knocked him out. There was something about the Thai that made me think he was some working regular guy who decided to try his luck or reclaim some glory - perhaps he had been a champion in his earlier years. There was something sad about the fact that there was just his wife and daughter who quietly watched. A few rounds went by, the Fin was still standing strong, and perhaps had succeed in softening up the Thai with his kicking. There were a few near knock downs - each time the Thai stood his ground and the referee counted to 9 before they started again. By the last round, though the Thai succeeded in knocking down the Fin once, he look like he was on his last legs. In between each round, he looked like near collapse - his coach held up a hand each time and he breathed something from it (mentol or some kind of smelling salt).

The bell sounded, the ref collected the score cards and the Fin won the bout on technical grounds. The euro corner erupted and stood up in roudy applause. The Thai barely made it to the corner. On my way out of the stadium, I saw him sitting on the edge of the ring, looking exhausted and breathing heavily. His wife and daughter waited for him below.

Chiang Mai

2004-09-04T21:12:00.000-07:00

Took an overnight train from Bangkok to Chiang Mai 2 days ago - and had interesting conversations with an austrian couple next bunk over. They were surprise by my mention of Jorge Haider.

Chiang Mai is a more relaxed city, ringed by mountains. Lots of lush forest surround the region. There are traditional Thai massage salons everywhere where you can get a 1 hour massage for only $2.50. There are more bookstores, coffee shops and night markets as well. Nonetheless, it is the 2nd largest city in Thailand. There is traffic, exhaust fumes and but less of the hustle and bustle of Bangkok.

Our first day, we had some northern curry and rice for lunch and then toured temples inside the old city moats. Then hitched a red taxi up to Suthep temple up the mountain. The drive up made me car sick but the views and sights at the top were worth it - as was the cool mountain air. One of the girls in our group almost fell out of the back due the steep and curvy climb.

I took a cooking class yesterday - we made 6 Thai dishes and were completely stuffed and comatose by the end of the day. Tomorrow, I will start a course on traditional Thai massage. It'll be a nice change to stay put for a while and learn a few things.

Staying at a cheap hotel near the moat (with a pool)!

Full Moon Party

2004-08-31T19:04:00.000-07:00

I'm currently back in Koh Samui, waiting for a flight back to Bangkok.

Last night, a group of us from the Coco Garden Guesthouse, next to my bungalow went to the Full Moon Party in Hat Ring, Koh Phang Nang. We were joined by 2 american girls I'd met in Phnom Penh, an australian labor organizer on holiday who wore the most outrageous pants I've seen for the occasion, Renault - a Belgian who loves "musique afrique", a friendly, though taciturn Scotsman, and Tomoko, the travel agent on a mission to "do nothing" from Japan. On a packed beach, there were travellers from from around the world, getting down under the glow of a full moon. Each bar on the beach was pumping their own music and the styles varied from psychedelic trance, drum n base, house, hip hop, r n b. People danced from 10pm last night until 2pm today. I ended up leaving early since I was fighting a cold - which my anti-biotic is starting to beat. The full moon party has become a cliche - but it was fun nonetheless.

In the last 2 days, I managed to get a cold, scrape up my leg falling off a motorbike, get gouged by the rental shop who wanted 11000 bhat for a few scratches on the bike (10000 baht = $250). They had my passport so it was a difficult position to be in - but I managed to bring it down to around 5000. Still a hefty amount considering the repairs would cost no more than 1000 baht at the most. I seemed to unnerve the bike shop manager by suggesting he was accumulating a good amount of future negative karma. We did managed to see a monastary on a hilltop and then spend a few hours in a herbal traditional sauna at another temple that would have been otherwise inaccessible. Nonetheless, I've resolved to be through with renting motorbikes. I saw a lot of people on the island with casts, crutches and bandages from accidents.

I had a strange dream the other night. I was back in New York City, wandering like some ghost. I'd found my old bedroom - but didn't recognize it. Inside, it was overgrown with weeds and plants from neglect. I remember walking around classrooms, presumably from my old college. In one classroom, I heard a sound like a sea monster bellowing being put through a ton of reverb effects - I realized they were playing a video from a concert from my old band from college. It was the end of one of our songs, and I recognized my guitar part being punctuated by Erik's rising drum cadence. I noticed it was a class on Beethoven, and I asked one of the students why they were playing concert footage from our band. The student replied "because it is about personal expression".

Koh Tao/Koh Phang Nhang

2004-08-29T17:01:00.000-07:00

Ended up in Koh Tao island just for a night before leaving for Koh Phang Nhang - I should have stayed longer in Koh Tao but I wasn't planning to dive and the place seemed a bit crowded.

Koh Samui had nice beaches but the island was a little too built-up for my tastes. Plus, there weren't many options at night if you are not into the rented Thai girlfriend/go-go bar scene - (which isn't my cup of tea). You see a lot of white men walking around with their Thai girls picked from the gogo bars. Ironically, the imagery on the surface isn't much different than home - where the white guys are all over asian girls like white on rice. I wonder how many of these guys would have a chance if there was no monetary transaction involved. There were few Thai tourists to be seen, which for me is always a bad sign.

Koh Phang Nang is a bit more rustic - and less developed - though I haven't seen Hat Rin yet, where the notorious full moon beach party is to be held in 2 days. I'm sharing a bungalow near Tong Salat port with an Isreali I met in Koh Tao - who couldn't stop singing the praises of Koh Phang Nhang. Today, I took a motorbike tour with a Japanese girl I'd met at the guest house next door, and we checked out beaches and waterfalls on the western side of the island.

Got some good reading done since all there is to do is to lie on the beach, or swim. Finished Francois Bizot's "The Gate" which is a memoir by the only european to survive captivity by the Khmer Rouge. Incredibly gripping account of his intellectual duels under captivity with "Douch", the man who was to run the S-21 death camp, and then the harrowing experience of trying to coordinate the safety of the international community seeking shelter in the French Embassy during the fall of Phnom Penh to the Khmer Rouge.

There's an interesting quote from the book about the American involvement in Cambodia during the advent of the Khmer Rouge that has some truth for American involvement in Vietnam or Iraq:

"When the Americans arrived in Cambodia, I saw them as allies in my impossible quest. But their irresponsibility, their colossal tactlessness, their inexcuseable naivety, event their cynicism, frequently aroused more fury and outrage in me than did the lies of the Communists."

A similiar theme is reflected interesting enough in Graham Greene's "The Quiet American". Apart from the entertainment value of a good yarn, I found the novel to harbor reductive, caricatured notions of the "Orient" and is problemmatic, in its portrayal of Phuong another voiceless, exotic plaything for the white man.

Koh Samui

2004-08-24T21:52:00.000-07:00

A bit of panic this morning when my crazy minibus driver took off w/ my backpack before I'd gotten back from checking out a guesthouse. Luckily, the driver had the good sense to drop it off later - after I'd freaked out and gone to the local police. It was stressful thinking about spending the next few days with no change of clothes. Next time, I'm not letting it out of my sight for sure.

I arrived in Koh Samui this morning after an overnight train from Bangkok. The train system in Thailand is pretty good I have to say, though the 2nd class sleepers w/o AC was a bit hot. Ended up sharing a train car with 2 people I'd run into in the Mekong.

The island is a bit on the commercial side, but its got green mountains, calm turquoise waters, white sand. It will be a change switching from travelling primarily as a cultural experience to something more of a sun/sea holiday.

Bangkok

2004-08-22T21:01:00.000-07:00

After a backbreaking mini-bus ride to the Thai border from Siem Riep (we're talking dirt roads w/flooded potholes), we changed to a German made double decker bus for a smooth cruise to Bangkok. I've heard tales of people having to change buses 9 times in Cambodia due to breakdowns. We got lucky - thought the total travel time of 11 hours is far more than the 6 touted in Siem Riep.

The difference is immediately noticeable across the border. In Cambodia, limbless beggars and dirty children hawking postcards and trinkets abound - while Thailand certainly has poverty, a good number of the people seem to live a middle class lifestyle surrounded by modern amenities. Its interesting to note that Thailand was the only country in southeast asia to never be colonized by western imperial powers - and today is doing much better than its neighbors (Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia).

Its nice to be back in Thailand, land of smiles and friendly people. Found a room near Khao San on Rambutree. Many are put off by Khao San as a notorious backpacker ghetto (a la "The Beach") - but I found its conveniences, my second time around, comforting. You can get your laundry done, buy CD's, cloths, see the latest pirated films, book travel plans, see familiar faces from your travels, get drinks, cheap food and budget digs.

I took the afternoon to walk around Siam Square and the nearby shopping/entertainment complexes. Shopping options in Bangkok must be up there with Hong Kong and Japan these days and has certainly surpassed Taipei. Got a haircut for $5 and a pair of designer jeans for around $10. I toured all the sites last time around so now I'm just enjoying the city as a convenient transit point.

Angkor

2004-08-20T21:29:00.000-07:00

I've come to my last day in Angkor, the ancient capital of Cambodia. About 1000 years ago, traders from China to the middle east once sang of "Cambodia the rich and noble" and it is not hard to imagine why based on this "city as temple". In light of recent warfare, tragedies, colonialism, Angkor is a testament to the once great genius of Khmer culture and power.

Angkor Wat is sublime - something to be seen and experienced. Angkor Tom, the Bayon, Bantei Srei, are all amazing amongst other gems. Someone once remarked that Buddhist iconography are most intelligently and most tastefully realized in Angkor and I think I would have to agree. In some ways, they surpass many of europe's architectural achievements from the same period (800-1400 ad). Truly one of the great man-made wonders of the world.

I've been exploring angkor with an english couple, an english girl and a canadian - who are all taking a year off to travel. They've been good company. We stayed at the Smiley Guesthouse, recommened in the guidebook but not mentioned was that it was surrounded on both sides by brothels.

The wine, cheese, and bread picnic near Angkor Tom was a memorable way to end our temple soujourn together. Tomorrow, I'm off to Bangkok to prep a southern Thailand trip.

S-21 - Touk Sleng

2004-08-16T20:18:00.000-07:00

In 1979, after Vietnamese troups successfully invaded Phnom Penh to throw out Pol Pot, 2 Vietnamese journalists walked by what seemed to be a school complex and was struck by an overwhelming stench. What they discovered inside shocked them beyond comprehension - they had stumbled upon S-21, a secret facility kept by Pol Pot's regime to torture and execute internal "spies and counterrevolutionaries". It became one of the worse sites of human torture and genocide in modern history - as over 10,000 men, women, children (some as young as 5) were tortured at S-21 and then executed at the Killing Fields.

I visited the school today - which has become a museum. Its an emotionally wrenching place, needless to say. I'd finished David Chandler's "Voices from S-21" recently and the experience brought the book to life in a palpable manner. Particularly horrific were photographs taken by the journalists upon entry of victims still chained to metal beds, faces blackened and bashed in from torture, a pool of blood underneath. The mug shots of people processed through the facility were also particularly disturbing - especially the fearful faces of children and young women. The exhibit is all the more relevant in light of recent events in Abu Ghraib. Our capacity for torture is dormant in all of us.

In need of other diversions, my loyal motobike driver took me to the Russian market where I bought a watch for $9, a pair of birkenstocks for $4, and a t-shirt for $2.

For dinner, I met an Isreali and a Brit at a south indian restaurant near the lake and we discussed S-21 and its indelible impression upon us.

I decided to head to the river district for drinks later - to soak in my last night in this city. I ended up at this bar called Shanghai - which initially struck me as a bit seedy but it turned out to be relatively tame. Two girls who worked there, after their shift was up, invited me to go dancing with them. At first I was hesitant - since I wasn't sure if they were professionals or not - but it turned out they were just out for a good time.

We headed to a club called U2 - I was probably the only male patron there with 2 cute, bumping and grinding girls beside me. They were a lot of fun to dance with - and seemed to know the words to all the tunes. Afterwards, they escorted me back to my guesthouse and my driver kept hinting that one of them wanted to go home with me. I opted to keep the evening perfect as it was - one of them squealed when I gave her a goodbye hug.

Phnom Penh

2004-08-14T21:25:00.000-07:00

Arrived in Phnom Penh this evening after a fast boat from the border and a slow boart from Chau Doc, Vietnam. First impressions, the street hawkers aren't as aggressive as in Vietnam or try to gouge you 1000% over what they charge locals. The writing is a beautiful, flowing script (evocative of elf writing from LOTR). The Wats, or temples, are similiar in style to Thailand's. The streets here are full of motorbikes and cars - strangely, many business signs are also written in Chinese characters.

Some similarities are not surprising as many aspects of classical Cambodian culture were precursors to the Thais' (the classical dance, the architecture). The Thais sacked Angkor Wat and wholesale transplanted the royal court artisans and artists over to Thailand.

I'm staying at Guesthouse #9 Sister, which has a nice wooden patio that extends over the Boeng Krak lake. Lots of Mosquitoes. Had some good indian food in the neighborhood. Surprising how even south indians have managed to find their way here.

Mekong

2004-08-13T07:50:00.000-07:00

Took a 2 day slow route to Cambodia via the Mekong Delta. Spent most of the day on the bus with occasional stops to see local workshops and also toured a river market by boat.

I've been in Vietnam for the past 3 months - so it almost feels like home now. People everywhere say I look Vietnamese. I confuse them more by answering in Vietnamese, that I'm not Vietnamese but American.

It will be interesting to attempt a new surrounding, culture and language tomorrow. Should be interesting moving from a historically sino-dominated culture into an indian-influenced one.

Saigon - Dong Khoi

2004-08-12T19:22:00.000-07:00

Decided to take an extra day in Saigon to do laundry, book stuff, get my Cambodia visa sorted out etc. Had lunch in Cholon, the Chinatown district in Saigon at a vegetarian place - the owner of the restaurant spoke to me in mandarin about her family history in Saigon - which made me feel at home.

In the afternoon, I took a long walking tour of Dong Khoi district - the business/shopping area of downtown, riverfront Saigon. In some ways, the area was not much different than parts of Taipei or Bangkok. Department stores, designer boutiques, fashionably dressed women, upscale concept restaurants and nice hotels. It is the scene of Vietnam joining and thriving in a cosmopolitan, asian modernity - and hints at what more is to come.

Met up with Luke, a fellow backpacker I'd met in Nha Trang and another australian for dinner. We had some drinks at a nearby hotel lounge. I chatted with a tall, pretty bartender that reminded me of an old ex-girlfriend. Made me sad to have to leave for Mekong Delta the next morning.

Also finished Amit Gilboa's "Guns, Ganja, Girls - Off the Rails in Phenom Penh" a memoir about late 90's expat decadence in Cambodia. Couldn't put the book down - very lively and full of interesting insights into Cambodian society from a specific group of people.

Another book worth mentioning is Tim O'Brien's "If I Die in a Combat Zone" - an excellent companion piece to Bao Ninh's "Sorrows of War". The author recounts being drafted and fighting in Vietnam, from beginning to end never believing in the war but afraid to desert for fear of shaming his family. Particularly insightful about the brutal, sadomasochistic culture of the army - evident during his experience in basic training and then CAT (Combat Assault Training). Goes a long way to explaining Abu Ghraib. Nice references to Greek philosphy, especially on what courage really is. That any definition of courage should include wisdom and temperance.

One of the pleasures of backpacking has turned out to be the opportunity to read good books, albeit pirated, sold all over the trail for $2-3 a piece.

Cu Chi

2004-08-11T19:20:00.000-07:00

Took a tour to the Cu Chi Tunnels - about an hour outside of Saigon. During the American-Vietnam war, US bombers dropped about a ton of bombs per person there, including one of the highest concentrations of agent orange, converting lush forests and paddies into an ashened, cratered wasteland.

The people there who consisted of rice farmers and peasant people, were essentially forced to go underground and live in the tunnels - which also became an important part of the Vietnamese resistance. The tunnels, which run approximately 200km in total were dug with nothing more than a hand hoe and bamboo basket for removing the earth. There were small medic facilities, kitchens, living quarters, ammo dumps, and networks that extended into the Saigon River for quick escapes.

I went down to one of the tunnels (enlarged and paved over for the comfort of fat-assed western tourists) and was exhausted after just crawling 100 meters. The air was dank, and it was hard to breath. Its incredible to imagine families living in the tunnels for years, even babies were born down there.

Our congenial guide had served in the South Vietnamese air force during the war. He also studied in San Francisco on scholarship for a year when he was 19, in 1972. He said he was treated well by the hippies there and has fond memories of Lombard drive. He pointed out that in 1980's, Vietnam was rated as one of the 10 poorest countries in the world. Today, they want nothing more but to be friends with nations around the world and get their help in catching up. Saigon is bustling today - I can't help but think they've come a long way in a short amount of time.

I also visited the Fine Arts Museum, which was eerily deserted. The building was pretty, though run down, done in a neoclassical style w/ asian characteristics - presumably by the French. Most of the art were propaganda themes run through recent movements (cubism, pointilism, fauvre etc).

Met up with Catherine, another Geekcorp volunteer stationed in Saigon, for dinner. It was nice to see the person behind the voice and share our war stories on the project.

Saigon

2004-08-10T19:08:00.000-07:00

First day in Saigon, I spent touring several museums- The Ho Chi Minh City Museum, which had several interesting artifacts and photos detailing the struggle against French occupation and then the American War. Then the War Remnants Museum - which was pretty gripping, especially the tribute to photojournalists, the area housing photos of victims of agent orange, napalm, mines and the replicas of the "tiger cages" used to jail captured VC's. Torture was systemmatically used by the South Vietnamese military, with the oversight of American advisors. Many of the prisoners did not survive or were left completely paralyzed after the war. The most tragic were the photos of deformed children born with birth defects as a result of dioxin from the US defoliation campaign w/ Agent Orange. This is a continuing problem in Vietnam - millions are still affected with no compensation from the US. We waged war not just on the people but on the environment, leaving younger generations still affected.

I couldn't help but think that history has repeated itself with Iraq. This time, a key difference is the docile, complacent media and subsequently, a complete lack of confrontation by the american public with the realities of war on a people, society, generation. Neoconservatism has replaced the domino theory. I felt nauseous when I read that Kerry recently stated he would still vote for the war if he could do it again. Both parties again differ little in continuing to support the war. I feel even more nauseous when I think of all the futile, inane discussions with colleagues and friends back home who bought the Bush line into the whole adventure hook and sinker.

The shadow of the Vietnam War often looms in the back ground today in the current presidential race, yet there is a complete lack of substantive discussion on the lessons of Vietnam. The lack of acknowledgement of historical imperialism and colonialism by Europe/US is often also consistent - which is key to understanding why the Vietnamese were unbreakable, and goes a long way to explain the insurgency in Iraq.

There's a conservative undercurrent today in the media that what we did in Vietnam was right and honourable, that the peace movement was nothing more than hippies and pinkos. This is even after the publishing of "In Retrospect" by MacNamara which essentially documenting the war as a hugely misguided, tragic mistake.

On a side note, it is also interesting to note that Ho Chi Minh had initial contacts and friendly cooperation with the OSS (precursor to the CIA) in his efforts to counter the Japanese colonialists. He also repeatedly appealed to the US president, and congress for help against the French occupation - obviously to deaf ears as we were essentially in the same game as the French.

After all this heavy history, I went for a swim and a workout at a place recommended in my guidebook - it turned out to be all locals, all friendly. Had an interesting discussion with a local there about Hanoi vs. Saigon. It seems that there are still significant cultural differences and lingering resentments between the north and south. My personal impression about Saigon tells me that people seem freer here, more open.

Ate dinner at the Bodhi Tree, a veggy joint run by a Buddhist nun near my guesthouse. The staff there are poor women, men who are trying to learn a new vocation. The food was excellent.

Nha Trang

2004-08-09T21:54:00.000-07:00

Arrived in Nha Trang, one of Vietnam's premier beachtowns, on another overnight bus.

Initially, I'd wish I stayed longer in Hoi An. But one day laying out on the beach changed all of that. The beach here is decent. My second day, I took the infamous Mama Linh's boat trip tour with a fellow traveller I'd met on the bus. The people running the boat were pretty wacky, they even had a live 'band' play after lunch (I think made up of the cook, the captain and the tour guide), using a homemade drum kit made up of plastic tubs. All in all, it was good for laughs and drinks. We checked out Guava, a bar last night and met a couple of girls from Milbrae who claimed to be from San Francisco.

Today, I signed up for a "Try a Dive" scuba trip. It was all in all really enjoyable - especially viewing the sea life up close. I ended up getting really nauseous from something (breakfast on the street? hyperventilation?) and had to sit out the second dive.

Heading to Saigon tomorrow morning.

Sorrows of War - Bao Ninh

2004-08-06T19:22:00.000-07:00

I finished "Sorrows of War" by Bao Ninh - which is hands down one of the most profound survivors tales of war I've read. When it came out in Vietnam, it was provocative in its unsparing, realistic depiction of the war against america. A fresh alternative to the official propoganda of the time. The writer was a veteran of several fronts who was the only one to survive in his unit.

In some ways, it is more gripping and relevant than "All Quiet on the Western Front", certainly a rare gem set against the massive body of work from the American perspective. I wish every american would read it - as it humanizes the Vietnamese with subtlety, contradiction, and complexity. All the nuances you'd expect from good literature.

It is particularly poignant in its portrait of pre-war Hanoi, where gentler, artistic souls still found a home. It is also bold in its depiction of the madness the war inflicted upon the vietnamese, much of it self-inflicted much the same way that americans - who shipped out thinking they were defending against the Red hordes - found themselves in the heart of darkness, raping and pillaging and senselessly bombing a people who really just wanted to get on with their farming and run their own country.

Hoi An

2004-08-05T19:22:00.000-07:00

Hoi An was the principal international trading port for Vietnam for centuries before Danang took it over in the last century. You could say its Vietnam's version, smaller albeit, of Kyoto. In its heyday, Japanese, middle eastern, indian, Chinese as well as european traders made ports of call here. Its one of the few places in vietnam that escaped damage from warfare. Imagine narrow streets, teeming with centuries old wooden-framed traditional houses/shops, many of which are lit up with lanterns in the evenings. There are also lots of tailors in town - so you can get jackets, shirts custom made to order for little more than the cost of the materials.

My first day, I took a tour of the Cham ruins nearby (dating from the 6th century). Cham was an ancient group of people that created temple complexes in the style of Angkor Wat (smaller in scale) that were heavily influenced by classical Hindu Indian and Javanese cultures. Unfortunately, most of the complex was heavily bombed by US bombers.

It was nice renting a bike and exploring the town the next day. I discovered that Hoi An was/is a traditional gathering place for the ethnicChinese community in Vietnam, including Fukkienese, Hakka (thats me), Cantonese communities. Its amazing to imagine that somewhere in town, there are people who speak the same dialect as people in my parents home towns back in Taiwan.

Hue

2004-08-03T11:31:00.000-07:00

Got into Hue yesterday on an overnight 13 hour bus ride from Hanoi on the infamous Sinh Cafe open tour ticket. $22 from Hanoi to Saigon with flex stopovers - for the value, it can't be beat. Most of the passengers were local vietnamese. It was nice having my friends Michael and Thuy send me off and look after my backpack while I was trying to scramble for a seat. Thuy was lamenting it was sad to travel in the rain. Along the ride, the local girls around me kept hurling into little plastic bags. Each rest stop I would motion for them to throw it out but they'd invariably prefer to sleep.

Hue is a charming, more laid back city/town than Hanoi. People seem a little friendlier. The cyclo/xeom hawkers are still overwhere.

I went to the Citadel - a 10 km sq complex of ancient imperial court buildings, reminded me of a smaller version of the forbidden city. The strong mandarin inspired past here isn't more evident than in Hue.

In the afternoon, I took Ms Thu's motobike tour. Being the only one in the pack that knew how to ride - as I'd been tested in the roads of Hanoi, I got my own motorbike (instead of being a passenger). The drivers went fast through gorgeous countrysides - we stopped at old bridges, pagodas, and tombs of ancient emperors. Afterwards, I had drinks at Ms Thu's cafe with a few people from Ireland and Australia.

Had incredible veggy, 5 course meal in town (for only 30000 d or, ~ 2$). Hit the hay at 10pm, really tired.

Today, I read Bao Ninh's "Sorrow's of War" all morning, while waiting for the afternoon bus to Hoi An.